Hatred.

-

A chip on your shoulder, a heart on fire & teachings of forgiveness is an interesting combination.


Do you want to know what I hate? I hate how easy it is to hate. I hate how resentment is always in the neighbourhood looking for the person that will let him in. He walks around with such a relatable story that makes it difficult not to invite him. Such a peaceful guest, if you don't pay attention to him you won't even remember letting him in, he simply just exists in your presence, until it is time to be fed.


I ran. I didn't know what to do so I ran. I took everything that I had, picked up every teardrop and ran. Fear was pulling me by the shirt as I saw him in the distance. I could hear anxiety's whispers. So I ran. 


I hate strength. I resent you for assuming that I'm strong enough to carry this burden. You watched me as I suffered and pretended that you understood what I was going through. You promised me that I will be alright. I resent you for that. You told me that I should keep my head up high, looked me in the eyes and ignored the tear that fell from it. I will never forgive you for this. You couldn't bring yourself to find empathy off the basis of my assumed strength. Which strength?


"The sky darkens, my life flashes, the plane that I was supposed to be on crashes, and burns to ashes..."


So I met the Grim Reaper the other day. I held his hand while music played in the background. I spun him around and danced with him. Then I showed him the finger. 


I hate cowards.


Do you understand?

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

?

-
"- Even though you share the same blood is it worth the time? Like who got your best interest? Like how much are you dependent? How clutch are the people that say they love you? And who pretending? How tough is your skin when they turn you in? Do you show forgiveness? What brush do you bend when dusting your shoulders from being offended? What kind of den did they put you in when the lions start hissing? What kind of bridge did they burn? Revenge or your mind when it's mentioned?" Yes (No) No (Yes) N/A
Read more

Unkwuhuig

-
Section 18 Sunset Avenue TMOV 10 May 2024 Dear Unkwuhuig, I hold hope that this letter finds you well. It's been a while since we spoke and I thought since that's the case, it would be necessary to reach out to you in this fashion. We didn't leave on the greatest terms the last time we spoke, I just hope that you understood the angle that I was taking. Nevertheless, how are things with you? I hope everything has been fair to you, as they say, you reap what you sow, only you will be able to judge what is fair for you.  But the purpose of this letter is to remind you of how unfair you've been to me. I don't want us to be on bad terms again, but I have to express my honesty. You have been the birth giver of fear in my life, you have spoken confusion onto me, making me doubt every choice I make. Everything I leave behind is questioned by you with the undertone of loss. I know you meant no harm, I know you mean no harm, but I have to express my honesty. I have encountere...
Read more

A Letter to Benjamin Raphael

-
I don't write in this blog for any type of praise or recognition, which is why I feel weird whenever somebody mentions it to me. Some people tell me that my writing is good, which I appreciate but I don't consider the weight of their compliment because it does not compare even slightly to what I wanted to say, but did not have the words to express it. I wish silence could be read, then people would understand me. But for now I use words. This blog isn't any type of diary entry nor do I consider it a form of art. I view these as my raw introspective thoughts of my most passionate phases. I try to write them in an encrypted way so it can't be too obvious for the reader, and it leaves room for different versions of interpretation. I do wish silence could be read, then people would understand me. But for now I use words. The blog maybe makes up for 20% of what I feel, the other 80% gets swallowed up and stored for later outbursts of which I hope can be understood. If I star...
Read more